words cannot describe how incredibly depressing it was to flip through all the photos i took in germany.looking at a still image is fascinating.it brings back memories of that exact moment when it was taken.it captures a truckload of emotions such that when you look at it again later,you feel almost as if you're living in the moment again.so.i dont know which is more saddening.that i cant turn back the hands of time,or that i can only do so by looking at pictures.
im positively sure that was the best 25days of my life so far.
vanna 22:52
Sunday, November 15, 2009
lets take a trip down memory lane the buildings remain but the people are gone the liveliness has vanished and only silence stays.
i told a friend recently,freedom is priceless.and she replied,your partner is priceless. ah the wonder of perspectives.
vanna 01:27
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
ich werde es auf deutsch sagen,denn nicht viele verstehen können: wer denkst du,dass du bist??du gehst mir auf echt die nerven.lass es nicht darauf ankommen!
vanna 01:13
Sunday, November 08, 2009
oh dont we all love it.the game of im-more-screwed-than-you-because-i-have-x-number-of-essays-presentations-exams.some things in life dont change.forever the need to present yourself in dire situations to only enjoy the marvel of others when you survive.the superficiality is revolting.but who's to say?
those blue eyes.one inch above and six thousand miles away.
vanna 19:16
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
shakespeare says, all the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players.
i say, i am the player, and all the world merely my stage.
vanna 19:47
Thursday, October 22, 2009
i kept waiting for the guilt and remorse and sadness to set in,but they never did.so as i wiped out the last vestiges of days gone by,i couldnt help but feel an overwhelming sense of liberation.at last at last.so long and goodbye.
and on the way home,we spoke like we never left high school.
dont we all love lingerie shopping!
vanna 18:40
Sunday, October 11, 2009
between those shades of gray and this and that
between those texts and sleepless nights
are we not all fools of love in the dusk of light?
its that time of the semester again.when you not only feel like shit,but start looking that as well.
vanna 21:22
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
in middle school, i used say Dear God, please let me do well this semester. now in college, i say Dear God, please let me survive this semester.
vanna 20:38
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
last weekend,i found out how expensive it is to play tourist in sg. yesterday,i saw students studying in the airport at 1am. this morning,i woke up feeling the worse i've felt in a long time.
vanna 01:45
Friday, September 18, 2009
i thought it would be funny if someone videos me in my room each time i attempt to write my literature essays.because all they would see is me rolling around in bed waiting for ideas to come and then typing a line or two on word document before jumping off the chair in frustration and going back to the bed.so between facebook youtube and junk food,its only 250 words in 2h.
week 5 weekend: R&R 1, work done 0 week 6 weekend: R&R 1, work done 0 but oh.the stuff dreams are made of.
vanna 23:47
Friday, September 11, 2009
its unbelievable how incredibly jaded i felt after flipping through europe photo albums from those on exchange.the more i think i about it,the more im beginning to see that this island is not a place to stay for long.they say the grass is not always greener on the other side,but how would you know unless you find out for yourself?
und ich kann es nicht mehr ertragen.schule ist wirklich scheisse :(
vanna 01:49
Monday, August 24, 2009
the thing with reading texts from chinese american writers is that they never fail to make me feel absolutely ashamed of knowing so little about the chinese culture.its hard to believe that an asian american could learn so much more about those traditions growing up in america than i ever could living in an asian society.
it is actually quite interesting how different someone looks like upclose.coz you really just see bits and pieces of a person.like an eye,or a ear,or the hair.and you never thought that when these fragmented images are put together,they make up the face you see.
vanna 00:50
Monday, August 10, 2009
the last part of summer was one shopping trip too many,one visit to mergui road to many,one drink too many,and partying all over again.damn!summer just has to end when things are getting good.
vanna 23:46
Saturday, August 01, 2009
it took me a while,buti think i finally get it.college education is never about what you learn in class.whether you have a fruitful one will depend on how you spend your summer breaks,what you take away from working with different people in those project groups,and how you cope with the avalanche of activities.in other words,everything except those damn things the textbooks and professors preach.
im not sure about the rest,but i know when i look back years down the road,the most memorable thing about college will be how these 2 summers brought me experiences i will never trade the world for.
vanna 01:05
Friday, July 24, 2009
and its another weißbier.another radler.another semmelknödel. and its more kids-hating.more rolling around in bed.more being broke. and its two more weeks to fall semester.one final fucking year to graduation.
vanna 01:34
Monday, July 13, 2009
its so weird that in the period of time i was away,i missed almost nothing about this place.its always the same when i get to somewhere and feel like i could really live there.people tell me they miss the food and the weather here,but whats there to miss when you've been having that for most of your life?how can someone tolerate constants.incomprehensible.
i think i left a piece of my heart there.
vanna 13:13
Saturday, July 04, 2009
its strange to be back home after almost a month coz it seems that things around you have changed somewhat,just that you cant quite put your finger on what.yesterday morning i woke up and couldnt believe im back where i always have been - in my own bed.and damn!that feeling sucks.its not possible,but nonetheless i find myself hoping that i could turn back the clock.back to the land of fauw-vays and bay-ehm-vays and cheap bier and having breakfast at 4pm.i looked up the menu of a german restaurant and they dont sell my jägerschnitzel and apfelschorle.
vanna 22:32
Thursday, July 02, 2009
as for munich,well..it was just like old times.only better ;)
vanna 02:49
Saturday, June 27, 2009
and i did it!managed to close my suitcase (tho its on the brink of exploding).its incredibly amazing how the past 3 weeks flew by.i never thought i would say this,but i think im gonna miss this village along the rhein.even though the bus comes only every hour and there's no shopping to do or clubs to go to at night,its nice in a way singapore can never be.
so we saved the best for the last.its münchen,bitches!!!
vanna 04:20
Thursday, June 11, 2009
this is how we do it: 1 buying umbrellas coz we were caught in the rain 5mins after leaving the apartment 2 waiting 2h for the train 3 walking 5km around the village in the rain while waiting for the train 4 walking 3km around downtown frankfurt for shopping 5 freezing our asses off in 7d C 6 nearly missing the last bus back to the village from wiesbaden 7 feeling shit bloated from humongous burgers and pints of erdinger 8 not finding the bakery and the convenience store we went to the day before 9 spending €3.70 on bus fare to wiesbaden only to find all shops close on sundays 10 spending €30 on cab fare from wiesbaden back to the village 11 cabbie nearly drove us into the rhein river and couldnt find our apartment 12 forgetting to check the bus schedule for the gazillionth time and waited 1h for the bus in the rain 13 hang around bus stops like hooligans at 10pm
vanna 02:19
Saturday, May 30, 2009
the thing about academic results is that you never actually find out what went wrong (or right).it leaves you guessing at which component you fell short in and so you find yourself wondering about the what-ifs.but then again,i dont care much to find out either.grades mean the world to some people.it used to be like this for me.then i realized..they dont bring you much beyond getting your first job.
its germany in less than a week.i simply cant wait.
vanna 01:13
Sunday, May 10, 2009
anddd summer came just in time before i became a starbucks permanent resident.i dont want to my hopes too high,but im hoping this one will turn out as awesome as the last.
so now.please bring on the booze.
vanna 11:35
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
though we have not been spending much time together the last 3months,you have taught me patience because i've spent so much energy trying to decipher you.and oh the sleepness nights you caused as i try to push you out of my mind!you may not get to read this, but i must still say you make me ecstatically happy when im able to comprehend your ever-so-subtle sentences.you've become such a huge part of my life that i wish i could spend every waking moment with you so i could painstakingly memorize your every detail.i dont know how you feel, but i will be terribly upset if my love for you is not reciprocated.yes you.you spin my head right round.
no points for guessing...
i was scrolling through my itunes and came across songs that reminded me of the good ol' partying days last year.needless to say,they stirred a tinge of reminiscence,but more so a wave of jadedness knowing that more than half my party people are half way round the globe.it was not good stumbling through last semester perpetually tipsy,but i still wished i could have seen more of them before they left.
vanna 21:45
Friday, April 10, 2009
because when you stand at the edge,its win or lose.fight or flight.do or die. your fate could swing either way,but you no longer care.and so it is
freefall.
vanna 16:55
Monday, April 06, 2009
the weekend was good despite overspending and owing people money.so it was to no one's surprise really that im useless at pool and that i cant count apples.but all good clean fun nonetheless.and its always nice bumping into a few familiar faces at one of the usual waterholes.then of coz im absolutely stoked about my new cellphone.awesome stuff,but it makes me feel stupid.
well do ask me about the 3/10 story if you dont already know.but still!Schadenfreude ist die schönste Freude!
vanna 23:27
Saturday, March 28, 2009
in one of the more decent conversations we had,a friend said that only after falling hard,will you realize the importance of doing the best to get ahead so history does not repeat itself.past experience tells me this is true,but it has also shown me that memories fade and somehow or other,we slide back into our previous state of complacency.then the cycle repeats itself.so i kept quiet and did not comment.
i dont want to remind myself,but between the last 2weeks and the next 3,i would have
1 submitted 5 essays 2 completed 4 projects 3 gave 7 presentations 4 read 6 novels 5 stayed in school till 10pm 6 had a 10h day in school without a break 7 gone drinking only once or at most twice 8 sent my phone for repair and lost it 9 to settle the paperwork for the summer exchange 10 abso-fucking-lutely no life
vanna 22:23
Saturday, March 14, 2009
the old always tell the young: your perception will change as you advance in the years. but what if..what if the generation now has a completely different mindset from the older one.a more liberal view of things,more radical thinking,less restrain.does this then nullify the life lessons they try to preach?
i always say we can never in the entire course of our life know whether the choices we make are right,because there is absolutely no way of finding out what it would have been like had we chosen another option.there is simply no point of comparison,and no parallel experience we can draw on.and there we have it.the unbearable lightness of being.
besides trying to grapple with the fact that im so fucking busy this semester,i realized i've developed a new found capability in times of stress - cussing in various languages.
i have a slave now.
vanna 02:38
Saturday, February 21, 2009
the stacks of readings!the tons of essays!EGAD.its not an exaggeration at all to say that my social life has dwindled to nothingness.
i would think that besides the prospect of oestrich-winkel in summer,there is little to keep me going.
vanna 00:01
Sunday, January 25, 2009
i might only be as yellow as my last name and skin color,but i actually like chinese new year quite a bit.im not quite sure what the traditional practices mean,but everyone can do with a little bit of extra money and free flow of pineapple tarts.AND im absolutely stoked about the long weekend we have this year.
on a completely unrelated note,i foundthis article and thought its a good read.
vanna 00:03
Sunday, January 11, 2009
and its the last semester of sophomore year.as much as it gets depressing just looking at the list of books and syllabus,we all know that there is a silver lining.
so.may the A grades keep coming,the money keep rolling,the booze keep flowing,the parties keep happening.
vanna 01:28
Friday, January 09, 2009
dear God,if i promise never to wear 4inch heels again,will you promise to make me grow 4inches taller?
