sometimes i think we're all so caught up in meeting deadlines tt we've lost sight of our goals.u know like how u r so caught up in e nitty gritty details along e way tt u can no longer c e big picture.
a friend called me up n commented on how depressed i sounded in my past few entries.
not depressed in this education system?
u must b joking.
I'm on the ledge of the eighteenth story
And oh I scream for you
-savin' me by nickelback
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vanna
23:48
i was near dying of boredom in lecture 2day when e lecturer played dis retarded video featuring a backstreet boys soundtrack.n i suddenly realize its been eons since i last listened 2 any sappy boybands crooning abt puppy love in their ballads.when i came home n ran thru these candy-like pop songs in my itunes library,it kinda brought back those pre-teen days where everything seemed so trivial,where nothing mattered much.then i look at where im now..i think.mann wad a difference 8yrs made.
actually i didnt notice it until someone pointed out to me tt e songs im listening 2 nowadays seem to be those angsty rock music.but i guess it has simply an avenue of escape.like how movie-goers watch films to escape from reality.to watch n live others' adventures coz they know such stuff's never gonna happen 2 them in real life.
someone told me e other day tt all she wants is a person who'll listen 2 her complain n whine n give e appropriate reaction.someone who dosent mind all her weird antics n can tolerate her n put sense in2 her all at once.n i told her: thats wad everybody wants.but i 4got 2 add tt,few would ever find.so.
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vanna
21:17
u know how when u spend too much time apart from some pple,it sort of slips ur mind wad kind of person they really r.n u fall right back in2 their empty promises n lies.
5 damn yrs.tt is how long i've been putting up with ur shit.
4 those wondering e current state of my rm:
e drawers juz got messier inside.e flag n mirror r up tho.
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vanna
18:59
its terribly ironic how something appears right in front of u juz when u finally stopped looking for it.
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vanna
20:50
u know how when u look @ pictures of pple in their younger days..u can almost c a kind of wildness in their eyes.its gives u this feel of who they really were back then,some1 u wld nv get 2 know ever.e spirit ablaze with curiosity n optimism way b4 e harsh realities of e society sets in..n b4 they lost tt last trace of innocence.that eagerness 2 explore e world long gone frm them when u look @ them now.e spark in their eyes lost within all e taxes,bills,n strategies 2 up e social ladder.its so disturbing 2 c e stark contrast coz it juz shows how much our love for life wears away with age.
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vanna
16:15
yes i know many pple equate hard wk to success.but its a different thing altogether 2 read abt how staunchly some1 actually believes in this.n how disappointed they can b when they c tt e blood,sweat,n tears they put in fails 2 produce results.
this aint a new concept 2 me.its juz tt i nv suscribe 2 this equation.its all abt how u play "the game".ie.doing minimal 2 achieve maximum.no?
i've stopped believing in a whole lot of things as e yrs go by.
gosh.if only i hadnt lost my rose-tinted glasses.
i guess sometimes its so hard 2 express 2 some1 wad u really feel in ur heart.but e irony is tt it is in this moment of helpless inarticulacy tt makes 2 pple seem e closest.
so it sounds like something out of a lit paper3 class.
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vanna
17:09
some pple make no sense.they condemn smokers yet they voluntarily inhale air polluntants when they light joss sticks n burn incense paper.
i keep getting this mental image tt one fine day i'll suffer a heart seizure while sitting in e lecture hall n listening 2 all e verbal vomit from the lecturers coz i hav no damn idea wad evrythg's abt.
goddammit.u know wad they say abt life being a dick.when it gets hard,FUCK IT.
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vanna
21:15
forgive me Father for i've sinned.
:)
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vanna
00:46
whenever u read or hear abt pple getting attached..falling in love..getting married n all..dont u ask urself,how long will tt relationship last?well,@ least i do.
happily ever after is bullshit isnt it?look @ those fairy tales like Cinderella.e story ends juz as e 2 get married.it doesnt contd showing wad happens after tt.wads gonna happen 10yrs aft tt so called 'happily ever after'?who's going 2 do e dishes?who's mopping the floor?who's bringing out the trash?look @ Romeo & Juliet.do u know y its so touching?its becoz e 2 died loving each other.they will nv stop loving each other coz well,they will nv get a chance 2 argue or fall out.wad if they didnt die?do u really think they're gonna 'live happily ever after'?
i always marvel @ how pple ard me can view their individual relationship with their significant other thru rose tinted glasses.coz i think i've lost tt ability.
this stinks.literally n figuratively.
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vanna
20:57
"all those dreams bout rollin in big benz and scorin the hottest skirts. will that really mean everythin t you? is that what you really want your life t be all about?"
but sometimes u gotta admit tt its these dreams tt keep u going when e last bit of motivation drips away.
i always wish 4 them 2 stop stuffing essays after essays up my arse.n u know wads e sad thing?its nv gonna happen.
| Your Reputation Is: Mean Girl |
You rule through teasing and intimidation..
Yet, people would give the world to be your friend |
wad utter nonsense.im definitely not mean 0:)
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vanna
12:31
:)
