Wednesday, December 31, 2003
so.its that time of the year again.you know,just before you toss the old calender down the trash.the time when u sit down quietly and look back through the tunnel of time.year in,year out,its the same routine.the location may change.instead of the study,it may be at somebody else's house,the beach,and the list goes on.but one thing remains constant - the look back.i run through the year that is about to become history.the highs,the lows,the so-sos.and of coz the most important questions: what have i achieved this year.i set some targets,make a couple of resolutions,break them the next day.you know how these things go...
well as far as i can see,its definitely not that great a year.lets start with the world affairs.when time magazine picked its people of the year as not statesmen or scientists,but soldiers,it shows what a sorry state the world is in.we spent the first quarter of the year waiting for the war and the rest of the year wondering when and how it would end.iraq,from a birthplace of human civilization,has come to symbolize terror,greed,and the limits of reason.when we werent watching the war,we were trying to stave off sars,and waiting for the light at the end of the long economic tunnel.even mr lee kuan yew looked for once his age as his wife lay in hospital.and two iranian twins who came in hope of better lives stayed long enough to win our hearts and left in coffins.
soccer wise,its far from a good year.and a year the sport will be glad to see the back of.the death of cameroon international marc-vivien foe after he collapsed on the pitch during a match against colombia mark a bad year for the world's most popular sport.things got no better when fifa president blatter admitted that soccer faced a growing prob with doping and is no longer 'clean'.it was also hit by a rape scandal in grosvenor's house hotel.and the high profile dope testing row of ferdinand now.leeds are currently facing debts of around £80million.chelsea had debts of £60million until russian billionaire abramovich appeared.one man with plenty of money is the world's most famous player,becks,who moved from man utd to real madrid for £25million and quickly earned his new club even more as 2 million of his shirts were sold.
now,for myself,much as i do not wanna admit,i've achieved little academic wise and i shall spare you the details to prevent this from turning out into an unpleasant entry.its been a tough year for me as well.8 core subjects to concentrate on.thats really something to adapt to.and yeah im still coming along.a new group of friends in a new class.thats fine too.i think they've somehow helped in making me pull through this year.you know what,i suddenly realize that i can go on and on about public affairs,but when i started on ths paragraph about myself,it seems painfully hard to find the right words to say.feeling the strain in every sentence..even now.maybe its just that i've gone through so much that i cant even figure out where to begin.well nevermind,i shall proceed.in terms of cca,we've undeniably come a long way.POP and taking over in july,the farewell party,no longer able to be cadets that could shirk our responsibilities.then theres ndp03 where the hours of saturdays seemed to drag on forever.especially the ones under the sun in the field.and also where break time flies past in the blink of an eye.plus a drastic turn of things at home which were once thought to be rosy.and learning that we should cherish everything.living life in every breath we take.
its been a downright grueling year and the people i've met along the way have somewhat moulded me into a different person though it dosesnt appear so on the surface as i try to remain the same for those around me.still the jackass piece of shit that craps around and screw things up.and thats something im not gonna change for anyone.but perspectives have changed and a very different view of things is seen through the eyes.thots not showing,merely keeping them down and laughing them off.before i end,i wanna say that my memory of the year award goes to ndp03.its really a goddamn fucking awesome experience of a lifetime.cheerios!
(Hope.It is the quintessential human delusion, simultaneously the source of your greatest strength and your greatest weakness.And it is an indulgence I have no time for.)
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vanna
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